When I started this blog, it was because I realized I was within sight of my 30s, and I did not want to begin my 30s feeling any less than great about my health and fitness.  Well y'all, I'm officially 14 months and 11 days from 30.  Time to get rolling!  I'm well aware that the amount of weight I want and need to lose for good will not happen overnight, through commercial diets or by wishing it.  So, here's my progress and my plans.

I am hovering around the 16-18 pounds down mark, and have been for about a week.  The beginning of this year has been stressful, and I admit I have not been very healthy.  Most of my weight-loss was accomplished by not eating much.  Sure, it was nice to see the pounds come off, but my mom suggested I start putting a plan in place for when I'm no longer so stressed out.  I thought she might be right, and since I wanted to enjoy that weight-loss and use it as fuel to my fire, I'm back in the swing.  I have been eating an apple every morning...mostly to make sure I'm eating something right away, and I specifically chose apples because they are great for boosting your metabolism.  So, there's that.  Aaand, I've been careful to make sure I'm eating plenty of vegetables.  My favorite snack has now become carrots and dip (a low fat variety), which I don't let myself have all the time because I don't want to get sick of it.  So I've been munching on unsalted nuts as well.  So far so good, the scale has not gone up and ALL my pants are officially loose - even if I'm not into my "skinny jeans" yet.  So, folks, we have lift off.  Furthermore, I am bound and determined to start exercising again.  I have decided to bring a few videos to school, along with my workout clothes, so as soon as my contract hours are up and kids are gone I can use my projector to work out in my room.  This is mostly so I don't have any excuses when I get home and realize I'm too tired/lazy.

There you have it.  I'm on the right track, and beginning to see enough progress to really light a much needed fire under my ass.  I can't promise daily updates anymore, but hopefully weekly weigh-ins can be accomplished.  I haven't figured out which video I'm going to do, but I'm thinking about starting the 30-Day Shred.  Just to see what can happen in 30 days.  May as well...Christmas pictures could actually be fun this year.  :)

Alright, so here's the truth: I've fallen off the blogging, because I've fallen off the healthy lifestyle wagon.  My fears were confirmed, or maybe it was a self-fulfilling prophecy.  As soon as I moved into my new place, and school started, and choirs started, the stress mounted and I stopped trying.  I have become lazy, soaking up any free time I have by just sitting.  I have consoled my nerves and stress levels with food and stillness.  I will not sit here and write that today is where I make the change, because that would be a lie.  I have not weighed myself in the past month, probably.  The last time I did, I had managed to not gain, but I hadn't lost either.  I'm quite certain I have now gained back, most, if not all of the few pounds I had managed to lose.  There you have it.  My willpower has officially left the building, and I have no idea when it will return.  This has always been my struggle.  I kick off a plan, I do really well for a couple months, and just when the pounds start to melt off, and a normal person would be inspired by it and continue to work, I quit.  So, audience, if there is one, I ask for your help and support.  I honestly don't know what it will take for me to whip myself into obedience.  Ideas?  I'm open to ANY!

I have weighed myself, and for the first time, I will put that number on the screen.  *sigh* Here goes....on Saturday, September 29th of 2012 at 3:27 in the afternoon, in all my naked, busty glory, I officially weigh 189.6 pounds.  Honestly, I'm surprisingly pleased with this number.  I thought for sure I would be back in the upper 190s, which is where I started when I began this blog.  Last winter, the scale hit 200 and I just about lost my head.  I cried, for days, because I was not sure what to do.  In the spring, in a desperate attempt, I actually started taking CTS 360.  I am not ashamed, because when that didn't seem to do anything, I realized I was going to have to do this the old fashioned way - with good ol' work, sweat and calorie counting.  Damn!

Here's the real crux of this issue...I'm lonely.  I have been single for many years, with only a couple short-lived relationships in the middle of it, and I'm done with it.  I would like to have a companion.  I would like to be someone who walks through the grocery store and turns the heads of men of all ages.  I would like to grab a guy's attention with my looks, only to have him realize that I also have depth, and wit, and can hold his attention and affection for longer than one night.  I would like to have the confidence to TRUST when a guy says he finds me beautiful.  Sadly, this has not been the case.  Don't get me wrong, I know I'm a catch.  But I know that because I love who I am on the inside.  I believe that I am a good, no, GREAT match for someone special.  Unfortunately, it's a rather physical world we live in, and somehow, I have to actually catch someone's attention before they can see the rest of it.  So...that's where I currently stand - somewhere in the middle of wanting and having a life.

Ok...enough soul searching, for now.  On to something completely unrelated - this weekend is for crafting!  My best friend is having a baby, I'm throwing her a shower, and I have a baby blanket to make.  I found a couple tutorials this morning (while lazily staying in bed) that will hopefully create a really cute, easy receiving blanket.  I bought some really cute fabric, actually meant for my now two year old nephew, and I will begin that as soon as I'm done.  I'm actually a little nervous, because I've never sewed anything (besides hems) on my own before.  My mom has always helped me.  But, I will be brave and just figure it out.  (Maybe on some other fabric first.  :) )

Alright ya'll...I'm connected to the world again.  Wow...what a busy week.  I moved about a week and a half ago and have been settling into my new digs.  LOVE being in my own house.  I don't have to worry if my music is too loud while I'm doing dishes, or whether my vacuuming at 10:00 at night is annoying the downstairs neighbors.  Soooo nice.  Yesterday I brought the pets home too.  I think my mom misses them, and my dad probably does a little too, even if he won't admit it.  The animals are still settling in, investigating the house.  But all is well....minus the diet and exercise.  Wow...I was worried for a reason.  Left to my own devices I have NOT been eating well, and this morning was the first exercise I've had, and it was a little ten minute walk with the dog.  At least it's something?  I haven't weighed myself.  Next month (after another paycheck) I'll look into getting a membership at a 24 hour gym here.  But, for now, I think I'm going to start the 30-day Shred by Jillian Michaels.  Mama Laughlin, a blog I read all the time, does it every once in a while to help jumpstart some weightloss.  So, I think I'll give it a whirl while I don't have a gym.

My plan: get back into tracking calories on MyFitnessPal, walk the dog every morning for a little warm-up, do the Jillian Michaels 30-day Shred.  So...from here on out, I'll update you on my progress on those things.

Oh yeah, and teacher meetings start Friday, kids come Wednesday.  Wow.  Where has the summer gone?!  Right, I traveled, painted and lost 12 pounds.  Sweet.  Ok, here we go.

Well folks...I figured out my grand prize for my weight-loss goal: A European backpack trip. Yep...its my new obsession. But I'm not going to even think about going until I'm fit and healthy enough for a week of carrying all my belongings in a backpack, staying in hostels, eating sparingly and WALKING!!! Ok, well of course I'll think about it before then, I've already bought a couple travel books...whoops. But, I will not allow myself to book any travel plans until that point- only dreaming allowed. Oh and dreams I have! So...on with the lifestyle change and now there is a VERY nice prize at the end!

Short post for today...because I haven't really done anything post-worthy. Parents got back yesterday, dad was totally beat today so I ran errands to book the moving van and round up some boxes. Tomorrow we'll exercise, finish painting the kitchen and begin packing. Ewwwww. I HATE moving!!!!

Oh dear...I got busy again!  So, after the last post, my dad and I started working on the kitchen - moving things out of cupboards and painting ALL of the cupboards.  It has not been fun.  We were also still working out in there, and there were just some really long days.  I'll post the before and after pictures of the kitchen when it's all over.  However, before we were completely done with our final coat, Mom and Dad left for Yellowstone with their good friends.  I left at the same time for a really busy week.  Friday evening, after the folks left, I packed up the dog, some food and a BIG suitcase and hit the road.  First stop: Waterloo.  On Saturday morning, my brother and sister-in-law headed to Illinois and left the kid alone with me!  It was SO great!  I had the dog with me, and they really seemed to get along.  This was Auntie M's first overnighter, so I loved every minute.  So, they got back Sunday afternoon, took me out to dinner as a thank you, and I headed for my next stop: Ames.  My aunt and uncle who live in Ames graciously agreed to take care of my dog while I was on the last leg of the journey.  They have an awesome black lab mix, and my dog (a smaller mutt) just LOVES playing with her!  They are hilarious together, and since I had already used my brother and best friend as dog sitters this summer, I decided to spread out the help.  So, I stayed the night in Ames, but bright and early the next morning, I woke up, showered, and headed to my next and final stop: Mason City.  I had never been to MC before, and I have decided I LOVE it!  What was I doing there?  I was at a conference for choir directors.  Our national organization is called American Choral Directors Association (ACDA), with a branch for each state (Iowa Choral Directors Association), and branches for regions (North Central ACDA).  This conference happened to be the ICDA Summer Symposium.  They have it every year at the same time, and this was my first time.  I'm always on vacation or broke, or both during this time of summer.  And, I almost didn't go this time.  I pre-registered far enough in advance that I hadn't started freaking about money yet.  HOWEVER, by the time I was looking for hotels I was a little worried and thought about getting a refund and calling the whole thing off.  I'm SOOOOOOOOO glad I went!  It was far and above the BEST conference I've been to, and that's really saying something.  I love conferences, and always have a blast.  But this one was just so focussed on getting us ready for the school year, and I have to say, I'm pretty pumped to start the new year.  Never thought I would say that!  So, it was a great week: Met many new friends and colleagues, learned A LOT, saw Music Man Square and toured Meredith Willson's childhood home.  Now, I'm home, my parents are still gone on vacation, and I've realized I have only a week left to pack before I move into my new place, and that kind of freaks me out.  Plus, dad and I have to put the kitchen back together.  Yikes!  Monday I'm auditioning for Iowa City Chamber Singers again, and hopefully will get to participate this next year.

There are a couple more things I have to report on from the past week or so: my new found talent for hurting myself, and of course, how I've been doing on my "lifestyle change" - because I refuse to call it dieting.

So, first things first.  You'll remember my account of crashing my bike after only the second time on it.  Well, I will soon be going to the doctor, because I'm afraid I've broken a bone in my palm.  I can move it just fine without any pain, but it's still extremely sensitive to the touch.  That alone makes it hard to ride my bike for very long, or put weight on my palm while lifting weights.  Problem!  Also, two days before we all left, dad and I were getting things ready, and walking in and out of the kitchen, about to go for a walk.  With all the things out in the kitchen, the passing space from the kitchen to living room is quite tight.  Dad and I passed through it at the same time, and I managed to break my "ring finger" toe on a wicker chest by the corner.  OUCH!!!!  There was a LONG stream of expletives.  However, we still needed to walk and after a little bit it didn't hurt to walk on it anymore.  Apparently my toe was just numb.  So, we went for the long walk, it was doing alright, but I could feel it again by the end.  When we got home and I took off my shoe and sock, it was completely purple.  The bruising has subsided, but the pain lives on.  DAMN TRUNK!  Oh, but that's not all folks.  On Sunday, while babysitting my wonderful nephew, accident struck again.  The boy was napping, which he does for about 3 hours now, and I had gotten restless.  I had already watched TV, packed all my stuff up and puttered around with the dog.  So, I had been checking up on the blogs I follow, and had landed again on the wonderful video hair tutorials of The Small Things Blog (link attached).  This is one of my favorite ways to pass time.  She has taught me how to curl and style my hair, even though it's not quite long enough yet for all of it.  So, I decided to at least curl my hair and try out one of the styles if the boy was still sleeping.  Well folks, I am CLEARLY not coordinated enough for that, because I really burnt my hand - right on the space between the thumb and first finger on my left hand.  Yowza!  I ran it under the cold water, but that was not enough to stop the blister from forming.  THAT one has not quite healed yet.  Still looks gross, and now it's all scabby and pealy, and during the conference I had to constantly keep a bandaid on it because I kept breaking it open.  Yeah, sorry, you probably didn't want to hear all that.  So, there we are.  I think for the time being I will stay inside, away from sharp/hot/hard objects until this gray cloud of bad luck passes over.

So, that brings us to health and fitness.  Let me start by saying, I am officially down 12 pounds!!!  Hooray!  But I will follow that up with some honesty - I was NOT very well-behaved this past week.  I think I stayed pretty reasonable most of the time, and the lack of free time in my day at the conference (not to mention lack of money) kept me pretty conservative.  But, I need to admit to myself that even today, I was not good.  I should have gotten up this morning and walked or biked.  I should not have eaten those little powdered hostess donuts (damn you hostess!!!!) and I should not have stopped tracking my calories on MyFitnessPal.  Ok, now that I've admitted it - which they say is the first step - I can forgive myself and move on.  I have so far been extremely proud of myself.  Despite the slower speed of those numbers on the scale coming off due to weight training, I have not once had a weigh-in with positive numbers.  All weigh-ins have been down from the last one, even if only by .4 lbs.  So, I sure as hell am not about to break that streak!  So, here I go...back on the wagon.  This blog is keeping my honest, and I will really work harder at posting more often so the posts dont have to be this long!  Yikes, sorry readers!  Busy weeks to come, but I'm dedicated.  Peace!

Alright, so I've been slacking.  Well, not really slacking, I HAVE been busy.  Since we got back, I signed a lease for a rental house that I'll move into in August!  Yay!  I love my parents, but I think we're all ready for me to be out on my own again.  No matter how completely painless it's been living here, it's simply nice to have your own space.  AND, the dog and cat can both come with me!  Hooray.  So, through the magic of technology and MUCH measuring, I have mapped out the entire house and begun  virtually arranging everything inside it.  Yup, I'm a geek.  Ok, so about vacation, and my life over that past week...


Vacation was terrific.  I could write a whole other blog just about my vacations, but I'll leave that for another life.  My parents and I went to Colorado.  My oldest brother lives in Loveland (formerly Ft. Collins) with his wife.  My sister-in-law's mother and step-father are from Iowa, and they've been trying to get my parents out camping with them in Colorado for some time.  So, we went finally.  Here's the catch - they have horses so they obviously have to camp in grounds that have corrals and horse trails.  So, we found a great spot in State Forest State Park, on the far west side of Poudre Canyon on 14.  For those of you following the news, you'll note that Poudre Canyon was one of the areas that was hit very hard by the fires.  Hwy 14 had been closed for a long time, but had reopened just as we got there.  Well, the day we arrived in Loveland, the whole area had been finally getting some much needed rain.  As it happened, the hwy had a mudslide, and we were detoured.  Woops.  So, we took this big hike northwest up to Laramie and back down southeast to get to the grounds.  It was still raining most of the way.  Ok, this is getting long, so I'm going to try to cut it down.  There were 3 more very important things that happened: 1) I FINALLY saw a moose!!!  Right on our way into the campgrounds!  And good thing it was then, because the rain pretty much kept us in our tents during moose watching time every other day. 2) I got to ride their horses!  My sister-in-law's mother had heard from my mom that I wanted to ride, and she let me!  It was GREAT!  She even said I looked very natural and comfortable.  Woot!  3) We were camping with COWS.  Yes, you understood me correctly.  There was a guy moving 600 head of cows through the area, and they were supposed to come straight through the campground.  This happened on my horse ride.  That morning, we could hear the cows in the distance, and in the time it took to ride maybe two miles, the valley just below our campsite was FULL of cattle. Then we found out the cowboy dude had come up and asked if he could move them through, and they of course said NO!  But, the cows were there, we even hiked through them, in a thunderstorm, just to hike.  Sooo...long story made very short, that was my vacation in a nutshell.  And since this blog is supposed to be about my new healthy lifestyle, may I add that I think we did QUITE well on vacation.  Much better that vacations before.  But all three of us were dedicated to not blowing all our hard work on 4 days, so we paid attention without going crazy about it.  I still had a pancake both mornings, but seriously, who is strong enough to resist pancakes cooked over a camp stove in the wilderness?!  Not I!


So, since I've been back, I am 2 for 4 for days having worked out.  Not good!  I'm ready to get back on that wagon.  As for diet, we have pretty much stuck to simply counting calories.  And here is where I'll share a GREAT bit of technology that I found while on vacation - MyFitnessPal.  This app is for iPhone, iPad, Android, Blackberry, Windows and can be accessed from a regular old computer.  Setting up your profile is essential when first using the app.  You put in your current and goal weights, height, age, gender and daily activity level along with how many pounds per week you would like to lose (it only goes up to 2 lbs, so you can't set yourself up for failure) and it maps out how many calories a day you should consume.  It's a tracker, much like Weight Watchers for anyone who is familiar with that, and has a FREAKISHLY large database of foods you can look up.  Plus, you can plug in your own recipes, or if all that is just to hard, you can simply scan the barcode of the food item you want to track, and voila! it's there in your tracker.  It also has room for tracking exercise.  Once you're done for the day, it gives you a "pep talk" and says "If every day was like today, you would weigh ______ lbs. in 5 weeks."  It's inspiring, and really is the best app I've ever had.  And I'm not even being paid to say that! The very best part about this app: IT'S FREAKING FREE!!!!!!!!  So, if you don't have it by now, please, take a moment and download it.  I swear, it's calorie counting made nearly effortless.  


Alright, so today, I walked 4.05 miles (yes I'm sore) and as of yesterday, I am 4.8 pounds down from when I started this crazy journey on June 25th (my half birthday in case you wanted to know).  AND, I'm another two pounds down from the heaviest I reached, back in February.  I will tell you this much, as I'm still not ready to share specific numbers with you, for the past 6 months (or more) I have been hovering all over the 190s.  This is the first time I remember that 4 consecutive weigh-ins have gone down.  Calories have clicked with me.  And it's become a game.  What can I get for 400 calories or less?! And with the app, it's even more fun.  I know if I had been only cutting and counting calories, the weight would have been coming off even quicker.  However, this is not JUST about the numbers on the scale for me, this is about overall health and fitness.  I've been doing (pretty much) daily cardio AND weight training.  I know the muscle I'm building is keeping the numbers from falling off too quickly, and honestly, I'm almost completely ok with it.  Sure, I'd LOVE to be 10 lbs. down now.  But, in the long run, I don't just want to weight less, I want to look damn good and toned in my clothes.  And, regardless of the mere numbers that have been subtracted on the scale, my pants are looser, I definitely feel stronger, and shoot, even my bras are getting loose.  And if you know me at all, you know I have PLENTY of boob to lose.  I am feeling confident and happy with the progress that I've made.  Not only physically, but mentally.  Sure, I'm still scared about living on my own again and being left to my own devices and the possibility of falling back into old habits, but I'm also feeling like I can definitely do it.  I'm not scared of having a bad day anymore.  I have had meals (vacation) that I am definitely not proud of, and made me incredibly remorseful.  But it's what you do AFTER that bad day that counts.  I haven't failed just because I let myself eat way too many calories one day.  I only loose if I let that one day win.  It's the next day that matters the most.


So, this was the longest post ever.  I guess that serves me right for procrastinating.  To whoever is reading, DOWNLOAD THAT APP!  Those are your parting words.  :)


P.S. Stuff Etc. Half Off Sale tomorrow.  I even bought the Early Bird ticket which allows me in an hour early.  However, it's apparently a little like Black Friday, so I might actually have to wait in line before it opens.  LAME.  Oh well, I went in today and took notes on things I want/need for the new house, so I may as well try to get them.  Happy Friday the 13th everyone!

Alright, I made it through the holiday just fine. I ate very well...even though I took a day off from working out. But, we leave for vacation tomorrow, and I'm scared about the vacation "let down". Luckily my parents have been doing this with me so I'll have their support, but I'm still scared. Needless to say, I will not be posting for the next few days. But I will definitely update when I get back. Wish me luck.

Great Things: Yesterday I had a TERRIFIC afternoon weight training session! I was psyched because I had a list of new exercises to try with the big ball and medicine ball. Then, because it was so empty in there, I got to use some of the "big boy" machines without feeling like an ass. I really worked hard and was totally pumped. Yay! Today, dad and I took a new bike route. Same distance, but significantly harder. We've decided to do that until it gets pretty easy then we'll be able to add distance more easily. I'm psyched. Today I had make-up lessons that I'll miss on Thursday when the parents and I go to Colorado, so I didn't get to do weight training. And I actually missed it. I'm exhausted and my muscles definitely needed the rest, but it's a good sign. Another thing that is great, completely unrelated to weight loss, is that found another place to look at. A cute little house (from the outside at least) in Mt. Vernon. Yay! So..I'm viewing it tomorrow, and if I like it I just have to cut him a deposit check and it's mine. Hooray! Now to do the math and make sure I can afford it if I do like it! Oh dear. I let myself have half a Hershey bar tonight. It was a little slice of heaven!!! I had plenty of calories left from a very slim dinner and overall day of light calories. So, yay. It was time for a treat and I didn't overdo it. Good for me! I'm not going to post challenges today, because I'm feeling very optimistic and positive. I'll save those for a bad day.

So...today I was reminded of the blessing of life and how quick it can be taken away. My best friend is pregnant, and another close friend was diagnosed with cancer. I want to be healthy for wahatever time I have left. Whether its enough time to live out all my dreams or just enough to get started. I want to live the best way possible. I don't want to be held back from anything because of my physical abilities. So, there you have it...more motivation to keep chugging along. Good thing too...because with the gym closed over the weekend and with the bike injuries, I haven't don't any weight training for two days. I have done the cardio, so it's not like I've just been sitting on my ass. And I guess it's good that I've actually missed the lifting part. I like feeling stronger. This morning mom and I took the same trail dad and I have been biking and it felt easy. I love progress!!! I also started reading Mama Laughlin blog. She started out at the same weight I am after her first kid was born and lost 60 pounds!!! It's so great to hear that with a whole lot of discipline and desire to do it, what I'm aiming for CAN actually happen! So, there you have it. I will start taking pics as well. I didn't get a starting pic, but i haven't gotten very far in the past week so it will have to do. So, here we go.... WEEK TWO!!!

Saturday:
So...if Anytime Fitness is supposed to be open for members ANYTIME, why was I not able to get in this morning?!  Grr.  Dad left early this morning, mom wasn't home yet, so I was so proud of myself for going out to workout all by myself.  Booo.  Anyway, you'll be happy to know I did not give up.  I went straight to the pond by the church and walked the trail around it a couple times.  I waited too long in the day, so it was too hot to do the usual strenuous walk, but at least I did something.  This evening I decided to talk a break from lifting, since I'm still sore, and instead started cataloging exercises to do with a medicine ball and with those big exercise balls.  I want to have more things to do than the weight machines, especially while I'm banged up.  Mission Accomplished.  I have a list of things to try!  If you click here you can find the video I used for medicine ball exercises.  And if you click here you can find the page for the exercise ball.  The last page has a TON of exercises for the full body.
Tonight was a great night for other things - Iowa City Jazz Fest!  I splurged a little on dinner.  However, I tried to at least make the healthiest choice I could think of....maybe.  I ended up at Oasis Falafel and had a Gyro Pita sandwich and red cabbage salad.  Well, I tried anyway.  But mom and I are going to bike in the morning, so I will forgive myself for splurging and get back on the train.  :)

Mind Shift:
I have started trying to block out all my old favorite foods at restaurants.  Instead, I am committing in my mind to finding new favorites that are also healthy and low calorie.  This is not the easiest thing to do.  Especially when it seems like ALL my favorite foods have been some of the LEAST healthy choices on the menu.  I guess that solves the mystery!  Anyway, that's just something I've been working on.  I know for this to really work, and to make a life change in my weight and health, this isn't just a lifestyle that I can adopt for a few months and go back to the way things were.  I was not maintaining weight, I was GAINING.  So, I just have to tell myself that moving forward, these changes to diet and exercise have to be for an indefinite amount of time.  There's no deadline, there's no goal weight even.  There's only fitness and a healthy view of food.  Eat to live, right?!

Update:
I did workout this afternoon! However, I had to get creative when I realized I couldn't lift, hold or push anything with my left palm and I couldn't set my left elbow on anything. That was a challenge! But, I did get creative and I came up with some new exercises using resistance bands and the bosu ball. Apparently the few things I figured out on the bosu ball really worked, because I tell you what, my buns are DEFINITELY feeling it!!! Then I went and got some groceries for step two of the flat belly diet. Now, this diet is both about counting calories as well as learning what MUFAs are and eating one with each meal. (MonoUnsaturated Fatty Acids) So, it's kind of like a game trying to put the puzzle of a meal together..staying within 400 calories while also having one of the MUFAs. Anyway...that's all I have to update. Pretty slow day otherwise, minus the giant storm that just blew through. Tomorrow will be the true pain test and I'll be all alone for breakfast and lunch, maybe through dinner even. I WILL work out twice, and I will NOT gorge myself at jazz fest!!!

Yesterday:
So yesterday, being Thursday, was my first day off from working out.  I'm giving voice/piano/guitar lessons at school on Thursdays, and have very little time to squeeze in a workout.  However, I was sweating all day without AC, so does that count?  The diet was interesting yesterday and it made me think: What is worse, not eating, or eating something bad for you?  Let me explain - before I left home in the morning I packed all the fixings for a complete day of meals.  I put it in an "insulated" lunch bag, with a blue ice.  It was so flipping hot in the classroom even, that the blue ice melted within an hour and ruined everything before lunch time.  So...I had a handful of grape tomatoes for lunch, and only had a bowl of cornflakes with raisins for dinner.  But at least I didn't get desperate and run to Casey's to get a crispy chicken fritter sandwich.  Cuz let me tell you, that sounded REALLY good!  Anyway, so that was yesterday, just wanted to update before I moved on to today.

Sidebar:
I have been looking for places near but not in the school district I teach in, which is a relatively small area, and a very tight rental market.  Hardly anything is advertised because word of mouth renting is so strong around there.  But, I've gotten lucky over the past week and a half and have actually been seeing some places in the local newspapers.  Yesterday I looked at a duplex that is just barely out in the country.  It is a great place, but I'm thinking the others who looked at it are probably going to snake it from me, and they got there first.  So, that sucks.  But, at least I know things are opening.  The pets are posing somewhat of a problem it turns out.  Not all renters want pets...hmm...how about that.  Oh well.  I'll find somewhere.

Back to today:
So this is just the morning, but I wanted to share something before too much time had passed and the details started to blur.  So, like I said before, Dad and I are biking and walking in the mornings.  This morning was a biking morning.  We got up nice and early to get out by 7 since it was supposed to be another scorcher of a day.  But, when we got outside we also saw that there was a little storm a brewing.  So we hit it right away, neither one of us afraid of a little rain.  It was a great ride.  There's a halfway point where we stop and get some water and a little rest before turning back.  As soon as we stopped there, the furthest point from home, the rain started.  It was just sprinkling, but it began.  I also noticed at that point that I wasn't NEARLY as exhausted as I had been the previous rides.  I already feel progress.  Anyway, we turned around and rode home.  By the time we were about 3 blocks from home the heavy rain started.  I could not stop smiling.  First of all, I noticed even the sprinkles were rejuvenating enough that my energy was at peak.  Secondly, there are few things that make me feel more alive than a cold rain on a hot day/week.  It was just so refreshing, and just feel like positive energy falling from the sky.  Hard to explain, but these are the moments that I feel close to God.  Anyway, enough of the preaching, because that smiling was soon at an end.  As I pulled into the driveway, I hit a bump and my foot and hand slipped off simultaneously and down I went - my first crash on my new bike.  Good thing I'm taking it in for it's 30-day "check-up" on Monday.  So, yeah, I'm covered in 7 bruises, scrapes on one knee, my stomach, both elbows and both palms.  Not to mention I braced for the fall so got a bit of whip lash too.  I don't feel so hot, but even that's not going to stop me.  Dad made a good point about the soreness...now I can go to the gym later and work out a little harder since I'm going to be sore anyway.  Haha.  We'll see.  So, there's the morning.  Hopefully there won't be anything big to report by the end of the day, but there will be an update anyway, because this is the first day off the 4-day Anti-Bloat part of the diet, AND I'll be left to my own devices for dinner.  Ahhh!  I can do it!

Intro:
Alright, so here I go again, trying to do this blog thing.  However, it's summer vacation, so I'm hoping I can get a decent jump on things.

So, I decided to start this blog as a way to really dive into this whole 'healthy lifestyle' thing.  Here's the motivation: I'M ALMOST 30!!!  I'm currently sitting right around the heaviest and most unfit I've been in my 'almost 30' years, and I've been sitting here for quite some time.  So...it's time to take action.  This blog, I hope, will provide some accountability for me.  I will post thoughts of the day's diet/exercise, as well as any other random thing that comes into my brain.  Down the road, there may (hopefully) even be some before and after pics.  BUUUTT, that will come long after some progress has been made! So, here I go.

First Steps:
Mom, Dad and I are currently on Day 3 of the "4 Day Anti-Bloat" phase of the Flat Belly diet.  So far...unsatisfied.  It's not that I'm hungry all the time, it's that the food we do eat has little to NO flavor.  So, that's been an adjustment.  I keep telling myself - "Eat to Live, don't Live to Eat."  GREAT quote that's been a good reminder of why I'm doing this.  It's not supposed to be easy.  If it were easy, we'd all look like supermodels.  No thanks.  In the end, I will be happy that I worked so hard for this...and man am I working hard!  Not only just with my amazing self-control on the food front, but I'm actually doing 2-a-day workouts.  Granted, it's only been 3 days, but still...!  One of the main reasons I didn't get a job over the summer is so I can have the time to devote to myself and my health.  Dad and I plan to bike ride or walk every morning, and I've joined Anytime Fitness to do some weight/circuit training in the afternoons.  So far - I'm sore.  Like, everywhere.  But, I suppose thats a good sign, considering my complete lack of exercise over the past year (or so).  So anyway, that's where I stand now.  The food is lame but nutritious, and the exercise hurts.  So very optimistic, I know.  But I actually am.  I feel good, despite the muscle soreness, and excited to actually do this for myself.

Deep Thoughts:
Ok, so there's more than muscle fatigue and pride going on here.  I'm terrified.  I'm scared that I won't follow through with this, like every other time I've started and stopped.  Even if I do great through the rest of the summer, what happens when school starts?  Will healthy eating habits be HABITS by then? At least I started this for better reasons this time.  Sure, I'm still hoping that by looking "HOT" I'll snag a guy, but the real reason isn't for some dude, it's for me.  I realize that in just a year and a half I'll be 30.  And I am terrified of going into my 30s in the worst shape of my life.  Furthermore, I want to WILL have kid(s) someday, and I don't want to do it like this.  I read a blog the other day that centered around losing pregnancy weight.  Why I was reading it, I don't know.  But, the girl who wrote it said something really obvious - A person who isn't fit BEFORE pregnancy, is sure as heck not going to be fit AFTER pregnancy, and it only gets harder, with lack of time to spend on yourself.  (I've paraphrased this.)  Of course I knew this already, but it sure hit me harder since I had already started this journey.  I WANT to be a fit mother.  But really, I just want to be FIT!  So...here's hoping that my desire to keep going, despite the setbacks and screwups that are BOUND to happen, and this blog help me to get over my fear of failure, and just continue to move forward.  One day at a time, eat to live, get fit for that little someday-baby.  :)